“Unterderseaboat Doktor” is a short story by Ray Bradbury that appeared in his 1996 collection Quicker Than the Eye. It’s about a man’s experience with his unusual psychoanalyst, a former submarine Captain during WWII who has his old vessel’s periscope installed in his ceiling—and things get more strange from there. Here’s a summary of “Unterderseaboat Doktor”.
“Unterderseaboat Doktor” Summary
It’s the narrator’s third visit to his psychoanalyst, Gustav Von Seyfertitz. The room is metallic-looking with unusual locks on a rounded door. Von Seyfertitz views problems as mines that must be stepped on, and he’s insulting.
Entering the room, Von Seyfertitz yells “Dive!”, which makes the narrator dive to the floor. He sees a brass submarine periscope retract into the ceiling. Von Seyfertitz denies the whole thing happened. He introduces himself as an Unterderseaboat Captain, and the periscope slides down from the ceiling again.
Von Seyfertitz looks into the periscope and gives orders to fire twice. The narrator is very confused and he’s told to sit. Von Seyfertitz offers to tell the story of how he left the ocean and his defeated fatherland and became the Unterderseaboat Doktor. He stretches out on his couch and begins.
He’s gone from the depths of the ocean to New York. One day while descending in the elevator of a high rise, he was overcome with the psychological connotations and shrieked “Dive!”, startling the other passengers. He left immediately to become a psychiatrist and hung his old periscope in his office.
The narrator touches the periscope hanging from the ceiling and wants to look in it. Von Seyfertitz discourages him but allows it. The narrator is shocked. It’s a psychological kaleidoscope of disturbing images. He tries to make sense of it; he believes it could be very valuable. He offers to get Von Seyfertitz a five million dollar deal for the rights.
Von Seyfertitz refuses. The periscope contains everything he has seen and known from troubled people in the last forty years. He uses it to keep himself busy, so he won’t think about all the people he torpedoed in the Atlantic in 1944.
Von Seyfertitz is overcome from letting his guard down. He claims the narrator saw nothing through the periscope. If this got out he would be laughed out of the city. He suddenly gets serious and looks menacing. The narrator promises not to tell anyone, but Von Seyfertitz seems to be looking for a weapon.
The narrator runs into the hallway to the elevator. Von Seyfertitz threatens to kill him. The elevator door closes and he presses the Down button. He doesn’t see Von Seyfertitz for a year.
Meanwhile, the narrator tells many people about his unusual psychiatrist and Von Seyfertitz becomes a celebrity, making talk-show appearances, writing a book, and licensing merchandise based on the critters appearing in the periscope’s images.
A little over a year after the narrator fled the office, Von Seyfertitz comes to his door with tears in his eyes. He’s suffering from Rumpelstiltskin Syndrome—he’s half Doktor who heals and half sell-out Admiral. He sits on the narrator’s couch. He blames him for exposing the periscope.
The narrator explains he wanted it discovered. That’s why Von Seyfertitz yelled “Dive!” that day. He wanted fame and money. Von Seyfertitz accepts this interpretation and feels better. He wants to go kill the monsters in his office, but they’ll have to get past the lunatics first.
A crowd of admiring fans wait outside Von Seyfertitz’s office. They rush through the crowd and escape into the privacy of the office. It’s been redecorated with very expensive antiques and original paintings from masters.
Von Seyfertitz hits and throttles the periscope. There’s the sounds of cracking, breaking and a deep inhalation. The narrator looks into the periscope and sees only the couch. He adjusts the viewpiece but there’s no change. They’re all dead and gone. Von Seyfertitz can return to a normal world. He takes a prayerful pose and soaks in the moment.
The narrator returns to the office a month later with the landlord. It’s empty, including the ceiling, where the hole has been repaired.
The narrator often wonders what became of Von Seyfertitz. He could be in Vienna near Freud’s place, in Rio helping fellow submarine Captains, or in South Pasadena near the film studios. He doesn’t know.
He does know that once or twice a year, while in a deep sleep, he hears Von Seyfertitz’s terrible cry of “Dive! Dive! Dive!” and wakes to find himself under his bed.
I hope this summary of “Unterderseaboat Doktor” by Ray Bradbury was helpful.
